A Sermon from the Church of Two Wheels

Dear Friends,

And I do mean Dear Friends. Before we turn to today's lesson let us first turn to each other and express our love for each other regardless of the number of wheels we may roll upon. One, two, three, four, or more, we are all roadway users in the eyes of the Great Law Maker in the Sky. Wave with ALL fingers extended. Smile with your eyes. Embrace with true meaning.

Thank you, Friends.

Today's lesson comes from the Book of Intersections, Chapter One - Right of Way and the Righteous.

For it is written, "He who passes through an intersection without turning to the left or turning to the right but who passes forward unerringly shall be Righteous and be found pleasing in the eyes of the Great Law Maker in the Sky. For the one who passes forward unerringly shall be given the Right of Way and shall take it and be glad in it.

"And he who does NOT pass through an intersection moving forward unerringly but who wishes to turn across the path of the Righteous Forward Moving One shall wait patiently, making the Sign of Turning Thusly for all to see and to approve and to find Righteous. And in doing so He Who Turns Across the Path of the Forward Moving One will be seen as Righteous as well and will be found pleasing in the eyes of the Great Law Maker in the Sky.

"But Woe be unto the one who says unto himself, 'I will be nice unto my fellow roadway user and I shall let him pass across my path even though I have the Righteous Right of Way and I will wave broadly behind my shield and trust that he may see my gestures and trust in my goodness and know that I am not simply sitting in place playing with my telephone and not paying attention and he will know that I am Righteous and would never suddenly run forward to crush him under my many wheels.

"For the Great Law Maker in the Sky knoweth that crossing paths are fraught with danger and did Lay Down the Law for the good of all and many that they not be crushed nor broken nor left bloody. For it is Good that All Roadway Users know whereof they travel and when and how and not be subject to the many and sundry whims of chance and foolishness."

Can I get an AMEN Brothers and Sisters?

Thank you, Beloved! That was a mighty AMEN and pleasing to all.

It saddens me to tell you that even I, even this day, even now on the way to this glorious meeting of Roadway Users did find myself standing at an intersection in the dark, cold, and wet of this night signalling my left turn across the intersection. The light turned green and the driver across the way, headed toward me, sat still as a stone when the light turned green. There were no turn signals flashing; I could not see any gestures urging me to cross his path.

As I stood there continuing to signal my turn with more traffic building up behind me I thought, "My but it's cold (37 degrees) and, while it's not raining at the moment, it is very damp indeed."

Sad to say, Brothers and Sisters, I began to lose my composure and did start to bellow at my Fellow Roadway User to MOVE IT YOU HAVE THE RIGHT OF WAY. Truth be told, Friends, I may have used the word "dickhead" or the like toward the end and if you may have been the one who believed they were doing me a favor, I beg your pardon, for I should not have called you "dickhead" or "douche bag" or "fucking idiot" or whatever it may have been I bellowed just before you finally moved across the intersection clearing the way for the rest of us to safely and sanely continue on our way.


Remember, Brothers and Sisters, the ways of the Great Law Maker in the Sky are NOT mysterious but rather are rational and sane and are borne on a desire to see us make our way safely in the world without mishap. Trust the Great Law Maker in the Sky and you will come to know the Clear Way Home.